Written By: Erin Jones
Once you’ve committed to placing your child for adoption, perhaps one of the most important steps in the process is to create a hospital or birth plan. Your hospital/birth plan consists of any and all of your preferences related to your hospital stay at the time of your child’s birth, as well as the actual process of childbirth. You can create your hospital/birth plan at any point in the adoption process, but Adoption Choices of Florida highly recommends creating one sooner rather than later. The last thing you’ll want to do a week or a day before your due date is to create a last-minute hospital or birth plan. The day of your child’s birth is a major milestone in your adoption journey, so all of your attention needs to be focused on having a safe delivery!
It’s very common for a birth mother to request someone from her support system be in the room with her at the time of her baby’s birth. This person can be anyone you’d like — a family member, a close friend, one or both of the adoptive parents, or someone else from your support system. You, of course, don’t have to have anyone in the room with you — aside from doctors and nurses — but most birth mothers find it helpful to have someone they know with them for moral support. The birthing process, much like the adoption process, is not one that is meant to be taken alone!
Not all birth mothers placing their baby for adoption wish to hold their baby and/or spend time with him or her after the delivery, but some do and that’s OK! Allowing yourself some time alone to hold and be with your baby gives you the perfect opportunity to celebrate the miracle of life and say goodbye. But sometimes, seeing and holding your baby is just too difficult, and that’s totally understandable. It’s completely up to you, but whatever you decide, be sure to include it in your hospital or birth plan.
To commemorate the birth of your baby, you may decide you want photos or videos taken of you and your baby, of you and the adoptive family, and/or of you and other members of your support system. But if you don’t, don’t worry! Some birth mothers prefer their privacy, so you certainly don’t have to have any photos or videos taken — the decision is entirely up to you. But definitely be sure to make note of these preferences — and your desire for privacy — when creating your hospital or birth plan.
Some birth mothers request to keep hospital mementoes from the day of their baby’s birth as a way of remembering the special day. Before including in your hospital or birth which hospital items or mementoes you’d like to keep, be sure to talk to your baby’s adoptive family. The day of your baby’s birth is just as important to them as it is to you, so they’ll most likely want to keep special mementoes from the hospital as well. If you’ve opted for a semi-open or closed adoption and do not wish to communicate with your baby’s adoptive family, reach out to your adoption agency or team and have them talk to the adoptive family for you.
The previous items in this brief list are just a few ideas of things to include in your hospital or birth plan! You might also want to consider preferences related to the actual delivery process, like whether or not you’d like to give birth naturally, have an epidural injection to reduce pain, or have an elective C-section. For more information on creating your hospital or birth plan, please visit our website’s blog on what to include in your adoption hospital plan.
It’s very important for you to note that your hospital and birth plan(s) are subject to change due to your hospital’s COVID-19 rules and restrictions. Even with the new vaccines being distributed, doctors, nurses and other hospital staff still need to follow strict COVID-19 guidelines to ensure the health and safety of all of their patients and prevent the spread of the virus. This means that on the day of your child’s birth, your doctors and nurses may not be able to accommodate for all of the preferences you’ve included in your hospital or birth plan(s).
If you have concerns about your hospital/birth plan(s) or your hospital’s COVID-19 guidelines, don’t hesitate to reach out to your adoption agency or your hospital to ask questions. Since the start of the COVID-19 pandemic, both adoption agencies and hospitals have become very accustomed to assisting with COVID-19-related questions and concerns!
If you are a pregnant woman in Florida considering adoption, and have any questions or concerns about the adoption process, please don’t hesitate to reach out. For more information on adoption, visit us at Adoption Choices of Florida or call us at: (833) 352-3678